This bathroom is a press release.
Our public relations team has done excellent work in here.
Guest towels
The good towels are ready. The rest of the house has declined to comment.
You're standing in the cleanest 40 square feet we own.
Enjoy the tour. This is the entire tour.
The fancy soap is for you. We use the cheap stuff.
Please appreciate the soap. It has been waiting years for this.
Please don't open anything with a hinge.
Some doors lead to Narnia. These lead to embarrassment.
The shower curtain is protecting both of us.
A tasteful curtain. A legally binding boundary.
The nice towels have never worked a day in their lives.
They are decorative members of the household.
Please judge the entire house based on this bathroom.
Everything you need to know is in this one room.
We cleaned because you were coming. Don't get used to it.
You are welcome. The baseboards are exhausted.
If you find a mess, you've gone too far.
Please return to the approved visitor area.
The rest of the house would like some privacy.
Behind that door: none of our business. Especially yours.
ONE MORE THING TO IGNORE IN YOUR INBOXGet on the list.
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We rarely invite people.
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